Not Me! Monday

If you're a fan of MckMama or have visited my blog before, you know what today is, so here goes:

• In NO WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM would I enjoy a Mother's Day weekend away from my children. NOT ME!
• And because I DID NOT miss my children, I would NEVER in a million years let my kids play hooky from school for no other reason than so we could just hang out together at the house. Even if it is just preschool...
• If we did happen to skip school (which we totally DIDN'T), I would certainly NOT want to spend that day driving all the way back to my mother-in-law's house to retrieve the purse that I DID NOT leave at her house on Mother's Day.
• And while we WEREN'T retrieving said purse, when the car actually WOULDN'T start, I DID NOT tell my restless and sweating kids (who coincidentally were the reason for the car NOT starting) "Be quite, Mommy is stressing" rather than "Mommy is thinking!" Furthermore, I DID NOT come to the conclusion that had we NOT played hooky, we WOULDN'T have been stranded!
• Because I am a highly trained athlete, I would NEVER complain of aches and pains after playing a family-friendly game of volleyball at my in-laws annual Mother's Day shrimp boil. I definitely am NOT old!
• I would NEVER spend an entire day sewing drawstring bags and baby blankets for my kids and their dolls instead of FLYing!

Whew! I feel better now! If you need some free therapy, run on over to MckMama's blog and check out the rules for participating in NOT ME! Monday. For even more therapy, check out what other bloggers have NOT been up to this week.