Not My Child! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Well, Wesley has NOT had a such a strange week that I am NOT going to substitute "Not Me!" Monday post with a "Not My Child!" Monday.

Here goes:

My child DOES NOT have paranoia issues. He NEVER believes that people in photos are staring at him. Furthermore, we NEVER catch him changing in his closet so that various family members hanging on his wall "won't see" him. Because he DOES NOT have this problem, he CERTAINLY WOULD NEVER turn a snowman soap dispenser and Santa figurine around so that they couldn't "see" him while visiting the bathroom!

NOT MY CHILD!

While on a "date" with my son to a Christmas concert by the Annie Moses Band, he MOST CERTAINLY DID NOT pass gas not once, but multiple times during the concert.  Even if it were my child (which it WASN'T) it WOULD NOT be so gut-wrenchingly hideous as to burn the inside of my nose leaving me with the desire to apologize to all the people around us who pretended not to notice.

NOT MY CHILD!

Okay, so I will admit that my son does in fact have an obsession with Indiana Jones. However, his obsession DOES NOT go so far as to include swiping a chocolate-flavored chapstick and smearing it all over his face in the hopes of obtaining that five-o'clock shadow that Harrison Ford sported so well in the movies.

NOT MY CHILD!

Being that we have a very empathetic, sometimes too gentle and kind child, Wesley would NEVER reinact the famous scene from A Christmas Story in which Ralphie, being fed up with the school bully, shoves him to the ground and starts wailing on him. To make matters worse (if this actually did happen--WHICH IT DIDN'T) it certainly WOULD NOT have happened at church! You see, Wes is NOT such a neurotic great friend that he can't bear to see someone else sit next to his "very best friend." If anyone dared to sit next to said best friend, he MOST CERTAINLY WOULD NOT take matters into his own hands and make sure that his seat was not "stolen" by another kid.

NOT MY CHILD!


And lastly, my precious son would NEVER EVER bust out in spontaneous prayer while watching an ambulance pull into the parking lot of a local restaurant. It certainly WOULDN'T go anything like this: "Dear God, please help the people not be too hurt. And God, make them better and get well soon."

 

NOT MY CHILD!

Awesome Giveaway!

Okay, so it's not ME giving away anything, rather, me trying to win a giveaway. MckMama is giving away a HP Touchsmart to one amazingly blessed person on Christmas Eve. To gain multiple entries, I have to comment on her blog post, Facebook about the contest, and finally, blog about the contest. Entries one and two are complete, so here is my blog post about the contest, granting me a third entry. Check out this amazing computer at the HP website and the chance for the drawing at MckMama's website.

Just don't enter...I want to win!!!

Calling all Facebook users!

Does your life seem to revovle around status updates and increasing your Farkle score?! It's okay to admit it, we're all friends here. I have a solution to ease your FB guilt: become a fan of Chase Community Giving and help us deluge them with votes for the following organizations: Emma's Hugs and Batten Disease Support and Research Association. There is a precious family in our church who's daughter, Emma, suffers from this devastating disease. With their steadfast faith in our Great Physician and their candid blog on daily life with Batten Disease, they are a personal inspiration to our family and the focus of many a prayer!


Put that clicking finger to good use and neglect your farm or flair wall for just a few minutes and click on the following links that will take you straight to the voting pages for these two organizations.


Emma's Hugs



Batten Disease Support and Research Association



Better yet, update your status, send out notifications, and spread the word about Emma and Batten Disease.

Not Me! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Who would've thought I'd be excited about a Monday?! But I am in need of some serious Not Me! Monday therapy. If you don't mind, I'd like to stretch out on your cyber couch and spill my guts. Not about how I blame all my problems on my mom (which, even if I did have problems, I certainly wouldn't blame them on my sweet Mama!), but rather to fess up to all the horrible mommy moments I've had lately! It's been a while, so this may be a lengthy session! Start the session timer...


You would NEVER find me resorting to "refreshing" my son's underwear in the dryer after my frantic search for clean clothes proved unfruitful! I mean really, who would ever do such a thing?! NOT ME!

NEVER would I carelessly forget to remove my MOPS car magnet before entering the automatic car wash at the gas station. If I would happen to have done such a thing (which I DIDN'T), it certainly WOULDN'T take me all of a week to figure it out!

Christmas was NOT almost cancelled at our house after a minor disagreement with WGH over the placement of the furniture to accomodate our Christmas tree. Furthermore, said disagreement would NEVER include a debate over my wanting to remove WGH's beloved recliner from the livingroom to make a place for the tree. If this incident did occur at our house, it would NOT end by me declaring that WGH would be responsible for finding new homes for the furnitre and putting up the tree, followed by my tweeking his furniture rearranging abilities while he was bathing our kids. I would NEVER behave so childishly! NOPE, NOT ME!

Since our children are our top priority and we NEVER lose sight of caring for their every need, I would NEVER neglect my son's dental hygiene at the expense of his getting NOT one, but four cavities! Even if I would've been guilty of such a travesty, I assuredly would NEVER feel worse if my sweet son had said, "Mommy I forgive you for letting me get cavities!"

When I mentioned I needed the therapy of Not Me! Monday, it was NOT an excuse to avoid cleaning house. Moveover, it was NOT a much needed distraction from the lockdown imposed on my kiddos' preschool and sister's college due to a manhunt for an escaped convict. If this was a scenario from our lives, it would CERTAINLY end with us all back home safe and sound (albeit, anxiously waiting for the capture of the convict)!

Ahhhhhh! I feel better! Thank you for letting me vent on your couch! If you feel the need to charge me for this session, just drop an invoice in the mail. Hopefully it will be covered by my insurance, because who would pay it? NOT ME!!

Wordy Wednesday

It seems that my newly-turned five-year-old is the star of this week’s Wordy Wednesday. Wes never ceases to amaze us with his observations and sometimes never-ending conversations. Sometimes serious, sometimes hilarious, always thought-provoking, Wes certainly gives me plenty of fodder for blogging!

This week at his five-year checkup, our brand new pediatrician got a full dose of our precious (and precocious) son! The introductions went something like this:

Dr. G: Hi Wesley, how are you today?


Wes: I’m not sick; I’m just here for my five-year checkup. I don’t need ANY shots!

A few moments later…

Wes: (holding a soldier action figure) Dr. G, this soldier is from Indiana Jones part four and he’s a bad guy. Do you know what kind of soldier he is?


Dr. G: No sir.


Wes: It’s a German soldier. German soldiers that are bad are called Nazis. We don’t like Nazis ‘cuz they did bad things.


Dr. G: (looking strangely at me) I see.

Nice introduction, don’t you think?!


Because the church was hosting a Judgment House for Halloween, Wesley’s preschool class had to be relocated for a week so that it could be transformed into “Heaven.” The Monkey class teachers decided to take their class to visit “Heaven” and needless to say, Wesley was a little excited to share with us all about his trip. When his Mema came over to visit he exclaimed, “Mema, today I went to Heaven and I didn’t even have to die!”


Enjoy the rest of the week! We sure will!

Wordy Wednesday

Boy could I give you quite the anthology of wild and crazy things my kiddos have said this past week! It never ceases to amaze me the things they say. And it truly blows my mind when I consider the things that run through their minds that they never verbally express! One of my most favorite things about raising my children is that my husband and I get to rediscover the world with them. So many times we take for granted how things appear or work, but listening to the observations of children seem to put it in a new perspective.



Take today for instance. Wes and I had to go in to see our allergist. Because of a very eventful night (that included very little sleep for our entire household), I let Jilly skip school--no need to terrorize her fellow preschoolers (or teachers for that matter) with any fatigue-induced fits! So she was able to tag along on our doctor visit. If you recall this visit to the allergist, you can only imagine what conversations could have possibly been had today! After exams and discussion with the doctor, a head x-ray was ordered for Wes to check for a possible sinus infection. Upon entering the dark x-ray room, the following was heard:

Technician: "Okay Wes, I'm going to sit you in this chair and put this cool apron on you. Then I'm going to use this machine to take a picture of your head."

Wes: (eyes as wide as saucers at the sight of all the equipment) "Are you gonna suck out all my memories?!"

Where does he come up with that stuff?

And then back in the examination room, Jilly was trying to make sense of what had just happened to her brother.


Jilly: "Did you see that cross (referring to the cross-shaped shadow from the x-ray machine) on the back of brother's head? That is the cross Jesus died on. But he didn't know why he was dying on brother's head. It was just the bad men who put him there."


Oh my! I guess we really need to clarify some things about the Easter story with our three-year-old!


And since I promised you here that I had a laundry related Jilly-ism to share, I'm certainly not about to go back on my word!


Last Thursday, Jilly decided that she needed a mommy-daughter day (translated: HOOKY). When I told her that girls too sick to go to preschool had to go home and rest and not play, she asked me if I would rest with her. When I responded, "No sugar, I have to do laundry." She exclaimed, "Ohhhh, LAUNDRY!! I loooove laundry! If I help you with laundry Mommy, I'll feel so better!"


Let's see if you hold to that opinion when you're ten!

Not Me! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Since I haven't participated in "Not me!" in quite a while, you might be thinking I've got quite the laundry list to share. NOT ME! While the list certainly is NOT long, I WON'T spare you the details by hitting the high points.

I MOST DEFINITELY HAVE NOT been using the claim of having a ton of laundry to catch up on as an excuse to sit and catch up on seasons worth of television shows! My family always has plenty of clean underwear and clothes and WOULD NEVER have to remind me of their lack thereof by leaving empty dresser drawers open as a hint!

As long as we're on the subject of laundry, you'd NEVER catch me having to sit on my hands in order to keep from refolding the clothes that my sweet Jilly folded.

And NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS would I secretly hide my joy at the fact that said sweet daughter seems to absolutely love helping fold the mountains of laundry that seem to plague our home. I TRULY WOULD NEVER save such proclamations of undying love for all things fabric-softened for a future "Wordy Wednesday" post!

We had our first MOPS meeting at our new church this month. What an awesome group of ladies! It was such a blessing to be paired up with some wonderful, beautiful, fun, and intelligent moms that the name "Looney Ladies" would NEVER pop in my head every time I recall the actual name of our table, "Lunar Ladies." Who knows, with all the giggling that was going on at our table, everyone else might have thought we were a little looney!

Being the totally on-top-of-things mom that I am, NEVER would I discover my daughter at the table feeding herself lunch because her mommy and brother were too busy deciding on whether to keep or purge one of the fifty million Lightning McQueen cars in his collection. Furthermore, I CERTAINLY WOULDN'T take pictures of her eating her self-made lunch of Honey Nut Cheerios instead of making her a different lunch!

When my precious Wes brought home his first-ever homework pages to complete, I WAS NOT panic-stricken at 8:30 Sunday night upon discovering said homework. Wild pandemonium to complete the assignments amidst typical bedtime routines DID NOT ensue. NEITHER did tears of realization that my boy will be five in a month. NOPE, NOT from this tough momma.

Don't let me have all the fun by myself! Why don't you breathe a sigh of relief from the freedom of airing your "dirty laundry?!" As for me, I MOST ASSUREDLY AM NOT off to fold more laundry!